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Where Your Dawgs At: Week of November 26, 2012

By Matt Dawgs Nov 29, 2012 - 8:31 PM print


I told you that change was coming. It all begins again, yadda yadda yadda. Well that change is now HERE!!! We Want Insanity. Where we discuss EVERYTHING under the sun and more. Now, in addition to my T.G.I.F. column on Friday, you guys now get me DAILY!!! That's right, DAILY!!! I will discuss random things going on in the world or whatever pops up into my head. All you have to do is bookmark this link and you'll be good to go. So now you can enjoy endless Matt Dawgs. YAY YOU!!!

Friday, November 30th:

  • T.G.I.F. WITH MATT DAWGS

My latest COLUMN.

Thursday, November 29th:

  • KELLY MONACO

it came out today that actress  KELLY MONACO has a sex tape. Her ex-boyfriend of over 10 years Michael Gonzalez tells Star Magazine that they made a sex tape 2 years before Monaco bared it all to Playboy and 4 years before she became a star of the then hit soap opera "Port Charles" before moving onto it's sister soap opera "General Hospital" and becoming the first ever Dancing With The Stars winner. For those who do not know me well, Monaco is on " MY LIST" and has been for a very long time. Please folks, let us start a Kickstarter campaign to get the funding to buy this tape from her ex-boyfriend so I can see it. I MUST HAVE THIS TAPE!!!! PLEASE!!!

  • Wilmer Valderrama

This guy absolutely HAS TO be packing 12 inches in his trowsers or more right? Like he isn't "famous". He was on "That 70's Show" and  is the voice of Disney's Handy Manny. That's it. Asthon Kutcher and Topher Grace are both more famous than he is. How in the f*cking world has Wilmer Valderrama banged a who's who of hot women in Hollywood? Look at the list (in no order):

  1. Mandy Moore (took her virginity)
  2. Lindsay Lohan (before she went crazy/druggie)
  3. Mila Kunis
  4. Demi Lovato
  5. Jennifer Love Hewitt (IN HER PRIME)
  6. Ashlee Simpson
  7. Jamie Pressley
  8. Rosario Dawson
  9. Jessica Alba
  10. Avril Lavine
  11. Minka Kelly
  12. and now..... EVA LONGORIA 

This man deserves some type of award. Amazing.

  •   LINDSAY

If anyone one person on this planet we call Earth is surprised by THIS STORY then I have several bridges in New York to sell you. Listen, Lindsay is a sad Hollywood story. Regardless of that fact, as noted many times in my T.G.I.F. column on Friday, she can still get it. Drugged out mess and all. She HAS to be a minx in the sack. Just HAS TO. That being said, that is about all she is good for. She has no other redeeming qualities about her. Her acting ability, while once promising, has went to sh*t. She has zero money in her bank account. She is a certified nutcase who does not believe that rules or laws apply to her and I am shocked that she is not in jail because apparently unless you are a Blood or a Crip in Los Angeles, you aren't allowed in jail regardless of how many parole violations you may have. She is a tragedy waiting to happen and no one should be surprised when the headline "Lindsay Lohan DEAD at age (fill in blank)" appears one day as my Facebook status.

Wednesday, November 28th:

  • HOCKEY

I am not a hockey fan. That is pretty common knowledge to anyone who knows me or reads my column. But...we do have a lot of Canadian readers who check this site out. So I am hoping that one of them who is indeed a hockey fan, can explain THIS to me. (click the THIS, it is a link). Apparently since the NHL is locked out by their owners, the Montreal Gazette, in order to provide readers with their hockey fix, has decided to have their staff play EA Sports NHL 13 on a video game console and report on the individual game results. WTF? Is hockey that serious? Video gameplay reporting? Really? This is the stupidest thing that I have ever heard a national newspaper do.

  • I AM OLD

When the hell did I get old? Why do you ask? Well because I am at a loss to where time has gone. When the hell did THIS:

Party of 5

end up going on to become THIS:

 

Slightly Single in LA

Jesus H. Christ. I feel almost wrong for looking at these pictures of Lacey Chabert. ALMOST.

  • SONS OF ANARCHY .

I have said it a billion times in my weekly T.G.I.F. column but for you new readers who skip that because you aren't into Wrestling or MMA, I will repeat myself here. If you are not watching SOA then I have absolutely no idea why the hell you are watching any television in the first place. This show is PHENOMENAL. The writing is top notch and no show currently on the air has you sitting at the edge of your seat from week to week worrying about what is going to happen. Next week is the season finale until next September (that f*cking sucks BTW) and there are so many stories going around and endless possibilities of what could happen. If you aren't into the show, now is your big chance with the finale on the horizon. Get yourself a Netflix account if you do not have one and watch SOA from the beginning. The first 4 seasons are avaialble for streaming and season 5 is what is currently on the air now. You do not know what you are missing.

  • GIRL MEETS WORLD .

Corey and Topanga are BACK!! Actor Ben Savage and Actress Danielle Fishel both confirmed this week that they have signed to join a new Disney Channel original series titled "Girl Meets World" which will be a spin off of the popular 90's television show "Boy Meets World" which starred Savage and Fishel as teens in elementary and high school. The show will feature the two as parents of a teenage daughter now going to school herself. The original show was a lot of fun and hopefully this will be no different.

Tuesday, November 27th:

 

  • HECTOR "MACHO" CAMACHO PASSED AWAY.

As you may or may not know by now, Boxing Legend Hector "Macho" Camacho passed away last week after being shot in the face and neck several times while sitting inside a parked car in Puerto Rico. Camacho, from Puerto Rico, was one of the most flamboyant and talented fighters of the modern era of boxing. He was a showman. He was gifted with extraordinary abilities. And...sadly he was a drug user and abuser. So much so that it is not a well known fact but Camacho was supposed to go on trial just a few short weeks ago in Puerto Rico for child abuse as he allegedly choked one of his youngest sons because he was allegedly trying to take his son's money to buy drugs. The court date was postponed and he did not have to go to court on November 6th. It is definitely sad when you have the Whitney Houston's and Amy Winehouse's and "Macho" Camacho's of this world who are born with special talents that are put to waste due to drugs and other vices that ruin them. But as the saying goes, you live by the sword and you die by the sword. Camacho and his friend were sitting in a car when a gunman opened fire killing the driver and critically wounding Camacho. The driver had 9 bags of cocaine in his pocket and an opened package of cocaine was found in the car meaning the shooting was likely drug related. WASTED TALENT.

  • THE NEW YORK KNICKS.

Is the dream over yet? I hate to burst your bubble Knick Fans but while the Knicks definitely have talent and can win games and beat elite teams like they did with the Miami Heat but realistically, they are not winning an NBA title. Why you ask? Because of a few reasons. One, Carmelo Anthony at the end of the day will be Carmelo Anthony. The Knicks started this season with 8 wins and 0 losses. They were playing defense and team basketball. They are now 1 - 4 in their last 5 games. The common denominator during that stretch is that Melo has been the leading scorer and is taking about 10 more shots per game then he did during their 8-0 start. That isn't a coincidence. Secondly, age. Jason Kidd is 40. Marcus Camby is 38, Kurt Thomas is 40, Rasheed Wallace is 38 and hasn't played in the NBA in two years. This is a team that cannot handle the grind of an 82 game season plus playoffs. Injuries are going to mount up and cripple this team. Make no mistake about it.

  • HALLE BERRY/OLIVER MARTINEZ/GABRIEL AUBRY.

So Halle Berry is dating actor Oliver Martinez who is probably best known for being an awesome villain in the piece of sh*t movie SWAT starring Colin Farrell, Samuel Jackson, Michele Rodriquez and L.L. Cool Jay. Anyway, Berry's "baby daddy" is a model and has been in a long and drawn out custody battle over their daughter Nahla. So on Thanksgiving, when dropping off Nahla to Berry, Aubry got into a scuffle with Martinez and the below is the result of that scuffle.

OUCH

OUCH!!!

  • VIDEO SPEAKS FOR ITSELF.

Ladies who want plastic surgery to look better.... JUST WATCH.

  • THE MAN OF STEEL.

If you are a fan of the Lord of the Rings trilogy and plan on seeing the Hobbit when it is released TOMORROW (Wednesday, November 28th) then you are in for a treat as Warner Bros. announced that the full length "Man of Steel" trailer is going to premiere before it. Fantastic. I really hope that they get the re-boot right this time as Superman Returns sucked donkey balls. While on the subject of Superman, news has been swirling around Hollywood that Joseph Gordon Levitt is set to play BATMAN in the ipcoming Justice League movie set for release in 2015. I am majorly torn on this one. Godron Levitt is a fine actor and has a great future in Hollywood. He is good in all of his roles and is young enough to have a long career. Flip side, he was in Batman already...as Robin. Lame.

  • VIDEO OF THE DAY.

HERE. A snake vomiting a COW. You read that right.




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