You have a lot of Facebook friends. Want less? Keeping with my rich tradition of finding evil ways for you to annoy your social media friends, I present an all-new (and quite easy) path to online solitude. Hey...it’s their own fault for accepting your request. Suckers.
Incorrectly correct people’s spelling:
Pick one friend at random and wish him a “Happy Birthday!!” every single day of the year. Then, on his real birthday, unfriend him.
Express the inappropriate emotional response to serious posts:
Make EVERYTHING a competition:
Ask people to poke you. When they do, call them perverts publically.
Post pictures of porn stars and tag people in them.
Purposely misunderstand their points:
Do this multiple times a day. Try to tag as many people as possible.
Inappropriately reminisce on sympathy posts:
Follow up with your own grief-stricken pleas:
Change your profile picture to a cartoon character with an “=” sign in red across it. Challenge everyone to take the ice bucket challenge. Say that 19% of your friends will do it.