TweetYep, you've got me again. Two reasons for this. One, not only does Corey Letson's team in the WWI Fantasy League, but this week in particular, I'm the one with the privilege of whooping his ass. And then Guttman, in his begging for me do step in, mentioned that on THE MUPPETS would be on the show. However, the swine neglected to say that they are just the Social Media Ambassadors, and thusly are essentially just tweeting. That said, the are actually appearing on Tribute To The Troops. Which isn't a show, to my memory, that we in the UK always get, at least right away. So we'll see. Who knows. Muggins here will end up doing that show too.
Anyway keep it refreshing for the latest updates.
We open with a video looking at The Shield's destruction last week, but actions that set a chain of events that saw CM Punk taken out, re-cfonriming to the biggest TV audience that it's the six-man tag TLC match instead. And they must think the Nikki Bella stuff has died down as they then brought up the John Cena & Dolph Ziggler feud.
We cold open with Dolph Ziggler in the ring and at the top of a ladder. Look at him, Mrs. Ziggler! On top of the world! He wanted to talk about 2 numbers. 6 and 15. 6 days until the show and 15 until Xmas. But they are the same for Cena as after he cashed in and failed, he's not won a title, but Cena's Santa Claus has forced Dolph to put his case up against Cena. But it won't be a Merry Xmas. He'd be the coal in his stocking and beat John Cena. And then he'd get the greatest Xmas present of them all in the World Title. You will note he said he'd beat The Big Show. BECAUSE THAT'S THE ONLY CASE HE CAN GO FOR, DUM DUMS!
As it goes, Sheamus comes out as we see that the whole entrance and ramp is set up with tables, ladders and chairs. We are reminded that he and Show can't touch. Sheamus congraulted Ziggler onfinally being taller than on everyone before saying he wouldn't be cashing in on Show. He'd be cashing in on Sheamus as he was winning on Sunday. That said, it would mean Ziggler would also have to win. And that ain't happening. down the line it's Sheamus vs. Cena for the World Title. Big Show came out giving it the "blah blah blah" to both of them, calling them delusional. He wanted to come down to the ring and murder Sheamus, but he would forfeit his World Title, so he'll wait until Sunday. He then suggests Ziggler try to cash in tonight after he beats John Cena. That's because Big Show is facing Cena. He then wondered if he could flay Sheamus with a chair. Sheamus noted his Ricardo-shaped ball shot on Friday. And while he would love to make contact with Show, he can't or he'd lose his shot. However, He can make contact with someone else, tipping the ladder over and crotching Dolph on the top rope, before he tumbled out the ring.
Vince McMahon is walking the halls and he's seemingly out next while the announcers confirmed it would be Cena vs. Show. I knew because I tweet. There's a marketing line for them.
Back from break, we saw Kofi Kingston & Antonio Cesaro on commentary and we heard Wade Barrett's music as he was in the ring. But then, Vince did actually come out.
What a main event you're getting! John Cena vs. Big Show! How great is that?!?! Please keepwatching! Please! (OK, he didn't beg for viewers, but that was the subtext). He brought Vickie out to make a second main event. He cajoled her into making Sheamus vs. Dolph Ziggler. And then a third main event. Something REALLY big. She wanted to make a handicap match for AJ. Vince thought it over and made it against Vickie Guerrero! You'll note that he didn't drop the handicap match part. He then brought out R-Truth for the scheduled match as Vickie stood there in shock.
Wade Barrett vs. R-Truth
Wade immediately started off hot, mauling Truth in front of the announcers to mug it up in front of Kingston. However, in the middle of nowhere, Truth rolled Wade up for the pin. Well, if they ever want to say a match can end at any time, this is the prime example.
After the match, truth trash talked with Cesaro as Kingston went up top and gave Wade a crossbody.
Up next an oximoronical Fatal Four Way Elimination match to determine a new contender for the Tag Titles with the Usos, Rhodes Scholars, Prime Time Players and Epico & Primo. Backstage, AJ was super-excited about her match, gabbing it to Aksana, hugging Kaitlyn. She wanted to tell Johhn Cena, who Kaitlyn said was in the locker-room. So once again, she just went right in and hugged him while dudes were in towles.. He quickly bundled her out, finally seeing the crazy-ass chick she is.
The Usos vs. Rhodes Scholars vs. Prime Time Players vs. Epico & Primo in a Fatal Four Way Elimination Match to become #1 Contenders to the Tag Titles
The Rhodes Scholars were the only ones to get an entrance. I wonder who is winning. Cody has a crappy moustache. Does he think it's still November? And indeed, despite having the "Fatal Four Way" moniker, it is an elimination match. The Usos and the Colons started off, as the Puerto Ricans worked over Jimmy Uso. Jimmy tried to right back, but took a low dropkick to the leg. Jimmy hit a Superkick and tagged in Jey Usos, and he hit a Superfly Splash to eliminate Epico & Primo. Titus O'Neil came in and downed Jey Uso as we took a break.
Back from break, we saw that during the commercial the Usos had eliminated the Prime Time Players with Darren Young being pinned. So basically, we joined the start of a regular match. They even conveniently stood back in their corner while they aired the highlight. Once again, Jimmy Uso took the punishment. Cody tagged in, almost purely for the crowd to chant "Cody's Moustache!" as Sandow quickly tagged back in for the Cubito Aequet. Cody tagged in and was downed, allowing Jey Uso to tag in. Samoan Drop was followed with the ass splash, but Sandow broke up the pin. Damien & Jimmy got into it and as Jey went up top once again, Sandow cut him off, but Uso headbutted Cody down again. However, his splash met with knees and CrossRhodes won it.
WINNERS: Rhodes Scholars
Up next, we get another womens match as Alicia Fox, who is a babyface this week, is facing Eve.
We join the announcers as they talk about the Slammy Awards next week, and we're voting for EVERYTHING in the WWE App. So if you don't have it, you don't have a vote.
Eve Torres vs. Alicia Fox
Alicia Fox should get a Two-Face gimmick, where she flips a coin as to whether she is a babyface or a heel at any given moment. We see a tweet that Miss Piggy sent out wanting to battle Eve. Eve started off on top, but Alicia seemed to take control as things spilled out. Eve begged off back in the ring, but Alicia picked her up and hit the Northern Lights Suplex for a 2 count. Eve telegraphed a backdrop but ran into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. While Fox avoided a corner charge, Eve yanked her out of the corner by the legs and hit her neckbreaker for the win.
Winner: Eve Torres
After the match, Eve called in a photographer for a photo op over Alicia's body.
CM Punk rocked up on crutches, so he's seemingly not doing the Bret Hart In A Whelchair gimmick. But he's hobbling out for a promo next
CM Punk & Paul "I am The walrus goo goo ga joob" Heyman came out to the stage. He said there are some who think the injury is phony. Who think the surgery didn't take place, in a scheme to duck Ryback. But it was real. It's what happens when you work more than anyone else and are champion for 388 days. Injuries happen. 388 days with no signs of slowing down. He took us back a week to show us how he was injured. The crowd chanted for Ryback, and Heyman said he was getting ticked off. This was a legimate champion, unlike the New Jersey Devils. He's been the reigning WWE champion for 388 days and got injured that needed emergency surgery. He didn't have a stunt double like The Rock. Punk wasn't complaining or kvetching. He was standing like the champion he is. Before the crowd tonight, unlike The Rock (although, as Heyman noted, since they were in New Jersey, who could blame him). He just shows up when he gets a title shot.
Punk addressed the people who think he should be stripped. He challenged someone to come and strip him of it. He went over the list of people who haven't beaten him, saying ryback's had 2 shots at doing it. The Rock gets ONE shot, and he would also fail. This Sunday, anyone else would be sitting in bed with a pain pump, but he would be attendance watching The Shield do to Ryback what Ryback did to him.
They talked about the match that was made between AJ & Vickie Guerrero, before telling us, once again, it's Cena vs. Big Show. But next, it's that third "main event" of Ziggler vs. Sheamus.
Sheamus vs. Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler now had his thigh taped up after what happened earlier, and despite getting the first shots in, Sheamus soon went after the leg. Ziggler telegraphed a backdrop, but took a forearm. Ziggler hit a dropkick, but Sheamus blocked a whip and yanked Ziggler out of the ring before runnign him down. Back in 3.
During the break, Ziggler took control of the match, knocking Sheamus off the apron and then hitting a Famasser, jumping off the steel steps. Sheamus battle dout of a chinlock, but took a knee to the gut, which saw Sheamus roll out. Neckbreaker by Ziggler picks up 2. Sheamus got out of another hold by sending Ziggler hard into the corner. Sheamus looked ot build momentum, but Ziggler avoided a charge and Sheamus went through the corner into the ringpost. Ziggler hit an armbar takedfown for a 2 count. Ziggler went to the second rope and waited on Sheamus, btu Sheamus caught him, hitting a Fallaway Slam. That put Dolph on the apron, setting up the clubs to the chest. Sheamus went up top, but Ziggler managed to crotch him.
Dolph climbed up too and eventually hit a X Factor off the top rope for a 2 count. Indeed, Dolph kinda spiked Sheamus' head into the mat. Ziggag or Sleeper was blocked, but so was the White Noise and Cloverleaf. The Fameasser was avoided and The Irish Curse picked up a 2 count. Sheamus wanted the Brogue Kick, but Dolph ducked out of the ring just in time. Dolph grabbed a chair and jabbed it in Sheamus' gut for the DQ.
Winner by DQ: Sheamus
Dolph hit a couple of chair shots, but as he went for a kill shot, Sheamus Brogue Kicked the chair out of his hands, sending Ziggler running.
We saw a tweet from Kermit about Damien Sandow. It's just not the same as having them on video. They got Charlie Sheen on Skype for this stuff. Couldn't actually give me some real live muppets?!?!
Back from break, Hornswoggle & Great Khali visited Vickie, but she developed a tightness in her muscles, so the guys went to work on her. It was all looking rather kinky when Vince walked in and said it was supposed ot be a family show.
Time to talk about The Shield, as we went back to Smackdown as they attacked Daniel Bryan after his match and then put Kane through the announce table. We then saw the video that they made that aired on Smackdown in full, setting out their "manifesto". Cole said there's been rumours that The Shield are at the building.
Alberto Del Rio made his entrance for a match, with Ricardo giving it laldy on the Albertooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo...
Alberto Del Rio vs. Zack Ryder
Ryder started off one step ahead of Del Rio, working a chinlock. Del Rio made the ropes eventually and powdered out. While he snapped Ryder's arm off the top rope, Del Rio ran into a flapjack. Del Rio blocked a Ryder charge block and kicked him in the back to take control of the match, working over the arm. He switched up a bit to the back, giving it some knees and then a backbreaker. But then he kicked Ryder in the shoulder for a 2 count. Zack escaped a chinlock, but took a Geman Suplex for a 2 count. Del Rio went to work on the back some more, working a chinlock with knee in the small of the back.
Ryder escaped once again, this time with a jawbreaker. He elevated Del Rio out and to the floor. When Del Rio got back in, Ryder started a comeback, setting up the Broski Boot, but Del Rio avoided it and locked on the Cross Armbreaker for the win. This went on WAY too long.
Winner: Alberto Del Rio
They promoted the Slammys again and how you can only vote via the WWE App DURING RAW next week. AJ vs. Vickie next.
AJ vs. Vickie Guerrero
The ladies come out as AJ is all happy about getting her hands on Vickie in front of a bunch of friends and family. But there's oddly no referee. Vickie wonders where the referee is. And then one came out. Brad Maddox. OK< I had Vickie pointing out that Vince didn't not make a handicap match and bringing out Tamina Snuka. Maddox, not so much.
AJ has words with Vickie saying she's trying to screw her before AJ has words with Maddox, who rings the bell and allows Vickie to get the drop on AJ with some basic offence. But a slap pisses AJ off and she unloads on Vickie. Guerrero tried runnung away, but AJ knocks her down and brings her back. AJ gave Vickie a back hard slap and made the cover, but Maddox kicked back and stood there doing nothing. This allowed Vickie to roll AJ up and get the moderately fast three count. On the stage, Vickie shook Maddox's hand and he raised her arm.
Winner: Vickie Guerrero
AJ pitched a shitfit in the ring before throwing various bit of set around, including ladders. She even gave Justin Roberts a great big ol' slap to the chops.
AJ is still losing it backstages, tossing over anything not nailed down as John Cena caught up with her. He held her until she calmed down.
Kofi Kingston vs. Antonio Cesaro
Oddly, we don't have Truth & Wade oncommentary. You'd figure they'd have the symmetry. Cesaro cut a proimo saying that he travells around America every week and America has gonew rotten. And that's no more true than here in New Jersey. And at TLC, R-0Truth would learn the truth hurts. Cesaro started off on top, keeping Kofi grounded. Kofi started a comeback, hitting some mounted shots in the corner. However, Cesaro snapped him off the top rope.
Bodyslam and double stomp by Cesaro. Another slam and elbow drop picked up a 2 count. Kofi mounted a comeback after escaping a chinlock, hitting his regular offence up until the Boom Drop, when Cesaro ducked out the ring. A foot race started, and back in the ring, Kofi hit a monkey flip. However, a corner charge was blocked before we took a break.
Kofi escaped a waistlock on the mat and looked for a sunset flip. While Cesaro blocked that, Kofi then flipped over and pinned Cesaro for a 2 count, although Antonio herked Kofi up and dumped him down. A spinebuster picked up a 2 count before he went back to the waistlock. Kofi kicked off Cesaro in the corner and hit splash to Cesaro's back for a 2 count. The SOS was blocked and Cesaro hit an European Uppercut to the back of the head for a 2 ocunt.
The SOS came off, but Cesaro grabbed the bottom rope just before the three count. Kofi's Stinger Splash missed, but he connected with the pendulum kick. Cesaro caught the high crossbody and gave Kofi a backbreaker before hitting the Neutralizer for the win.
Winner: Antonio Cesaro
MizTV is suddenly next and the guests are the Rhodes Scholars. By the way, even though it was advertised as such, apparently, Rhodes Scholars aren't the contenders. They're facing Rey Mysterio & Sin Cara in a tables match to determine the contenders instead. Nice of them to make that totally clear.
Well, this week, Miz TV was on the stage. He was wearing a douchey suit. It's one thing to put him behind the eight-ball as a babyface, but stuff like this is not helping. He introduced Rhodes Scholars, who he called The Beardo And The Weirdo. The crowd chanted for Cody's lip hair once again. Sandow gave Rhodes the big re-introduction. Rhodes said that while Miz watches Youtube clips of his main eventing Wrestlemania, he and Sandow were shining lights among neanderthals.
Miz asked about the tache', asking if he grew it or if some of Damien's beard got stuck on there. Sandow said that for a reality star, he'd lost touch with it. Miz said that they would hit the ground harder than Manny Pacquiao on Sunday. Sandow complained about the level of questionining. Miz asked about Sandow not visiting him while injured or Sandow saying he's carrying Cody. That Sandow was the HBK to Cody's Jannetty. That Cody would always be over-shadowed by his father or tag partner. Cody stood up for Sandow before they stormed off.
Miz said that after seeing Sandow's trunks and smelling Cody's moustache, he had a new name for them. The pink and the stink. And suddenly, a MMF three way with Vickie, Khali & Hornswoggle isn't the least PG thing ont he show.
Backstage AJ caught up with Cena. She wanted to go to the ring and support him. They noted the history of AJ being out there when Big Show's around. He eventually managed to convince her to stay backstage. But will she??? That third main event is next.
Dolph Ziggler came out to do some announcing.
John Cena vs. Big Show
We saw a girl immeidately burst into tears as Cena's music hit. Big Show over-powered Cena in the early going, but Cena blocked a charge and looked for a sleeper. He got Show to a knee and eventually a pin, but not for long. The AA failed as Cena couldn't hold Big Show up as we took a break.
We came back to immediately see Cena reverse a chokeslam into a DDT. However, he ran into a side slam for a 2 count. Cena hit a dropkick, but Show came off the ropes and hit a spear for a 2 count. Big Show with a scoop slam and an elbow drop.Cena threw some fists, but he ran into a big ol' bearhug. Cena got out and looked for the STF, but Big Show kicked him off and out of the ring. Show tossed Cena into the guardrail. Back in the ring. Cena ran into a clothesline. Big Show wanted the Vader Bomb and it connected for a 2 count.
In another corner, Big Show went for another, but Cena rolled out the way, whcih started Cena's comeback. However, after the Five Knuckle Shuffle, Cena ran into a chokeslam for a close 2 count. Show wanted the KO Punch, but Cena ducked and whipped off the AA. Before he could make the pin however, The Shield, starting with Seth Rollins, ran in and attacked Cena for the DQ.
Winner by DQ: John Cena
They beat on Cena before getting one of the extra tables and putting it in the ring. Reigns got himself a ladder. Before anythign could happen, Hell No ran down for the save. Ziggler went after Cena, as did Big Show. Sheamus ran down to help out, going for Ziggler. In the clear ring, Cena put Ziggler through a table. The Shiled brought Hell No back in to set up Ryback coming down. Ryback tossed a ladder right at the three of them. We ended up with a 5 vs. 5 brawl going on as the show ended.