An Annual Insanity Tradition for Eleven Years!
Click the following links to check out the past JG Insanity BBQs:
Memorial Day 2004
Memorial Day 2005
Memorial Day 2006
Memorial Day 2007
Memorial Day 2008
Memorial Day 2009
Memorial Day 2010
WWE Memorial Day BBQ 2014...McMahon Home...
Triple H: Investors, molesters. Who gives a damn? I can beat up stupid Don Jones.
Vince McMahon: Dow Jones. It's called the Dow Jones and no, you can't fight it.
Hunter: Exactly. Because he's a bitch.
You don't get
this whole stock market thing, do you?
Hunter: Whatever. It
doesn't matter anyway. You're still a thousandaire.
Long pause. Vince
glares at Hunter, who puts his hands around his own face like flower petals and
smiles huge from the center.
(changing the subject) Is Sting here yet?
Hunter: Definitely. He's right over there.
Vince: OK good.
(squinting) Oh wait. No he's not. That's a frisbee.
has been going on for years.
The Wyatt Family walks over. Bray is holding one of Vince's citronella candles to keep bugs
(blowing out candle) Vince McMahon's
Vince: Ha ha. Good to see you...
(interuppting) Mr. Mac-Man. Oh, ho, Mr. Mac-Man. Ha ha. You look at me -
YOU LOOK AT ME - and you see a man. I look and I see, ah ha ha, a fear. A fear that my mama used to coddle and
nurture and give to the great beyond above. Because in the heart of every man, there is a being that...
Vince: Stop. Just stop. Save it for when we need to kill five minutes on TV.
Hunter: Yeah. Just go
and swallow the mustards.
Bray: Uh, I think you mean
"follow the buzzards".
(sarcastically) Uh, n
ooooo. I meant
"swallow the mustards".
lined up over there. Down 'em.
Bray: Down 'em?
Yeah. Like our stock.
Hunter: I thought it's good when the stocks go down - like when
girls do it.
Vince: It's not the
same thing! What the...? Ugh!
(to Bray) Sorry, he's weird. But seriously, kid. Go drink the mustards or else we're going to
turn your brother into "Hobo Dallas - The Man on Cialis". We've already made the action figure molds.
The Wyatts walk away. There is audible sobbing.
(whispering) Yo. I wanna bang that sheep.
Vince: Pretty sure that's a dude.
Hunter: Nah. Sheep are marsupials, I think. Let me ask Evolution.
Yo! Bobby! Kenny! Get over here!
Evolution walks over.
Randy Orton: Stop
calling us that.
Hunter: Ha ha. You love it. Hey. Quick question. Could I bang a marsupial?
Randy: Like for money?
What the hell
are you talking about?! This is ridiculous. Ignore him. You guys having a
Batista: No. The car
valet booed me.
Vince: That's because
we didn't pay him. We booked the party
three months ago and offered him about $5000 for the day. Fast forward to today - and I gave him $7 and a bite of my Polly-O String Cheese.
Hunter: Don't worry
about it. You're still a
(checking his phone) Hundredaire.
Before Vince can respond, The Exotic Express pulls up and
Adam Rose, being carried by a crowd of party-goers emerges.
As they cross past
the barbecue, Vince points one finger to the other side of the yard. The party continues carrying Rose, who is now
screaming for help, and dumps him in the pool. Kane, who is in the pool, proceeds to hold him underwater for four
Vince: Ah. OK. So
Randy: You want us to go fish his body out and feed it to
so proud of how well you've learned to fit in around here.
Go to it.
Sting is here.
No. I was looking at that frisbee again.
Vince: Stop doing
Hello, guys. I just wanted to thank you for...
Hunter: AH! GET OUT
OF HERE, YOU GREASY F**K! GO! GO! GO!
Rusev, confused, quickly scrambles away.
What was that
I don't know.
I do that for fun. Like you used to do
to The Killer Bees.
I made them cry once.
Hunter: Hey. Were they really bees or just pretend?
Out of nowhere, from the treehouse above, repels the man
called Sting! Smoke! Music! Pyro! The works.
Wooooo! It's showtime, folks! The...Stinger...is... here!
Silence. Blank stares.
No thanks. I'm over it.
Sorry, Crowdust. It's all very 2008. The moment's passed.
(winking) dollaraire has spoken.
God, I hate
This party's over. Turn the sprinklers on.
I'm gonna go sheer me a sheep, if you get my
I'm afraid I
(hanging his head)
I'm afraid I do.